Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Trying to get in touch with our surrogates
So many have asked, so few get a result ... ask to be in contact with your surrogate or surrogates, and you get denied. You will get bullshit, you will be told they don't want to get in touch with you, and how dare you ask to bother them.
Hello Megan,
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Megan Sainsbury <megansainsbury@optusnet.com.au>
Date: Sun, Oct 13, 2013 at 1:50 PM
Subject: rani and mithuHI allCan you please give the contact details for Rani and Mithu.I have not been able to contact them through the addresses on the surrogacy contract.It is important for me and Bob, that we can have ongoing communication, for the sake of Toby and Mishali.Both Rani and Mithu agreed to ongoing contact when we met them, in Delhi, at the time our babies were born.ThanksMeg, Bob. Toby and Mishali.
From: Saurabh Kumar
Subject: Re: rani and mithu
Date: 15 October 2013 9:35:23 PM AWST
To: megansainsbury@optusnet.com.au
Cc:
Hello Megan,
I will start the process.
Meanwhile, please explain in what manner have you tried to contact the Surrogate mothers.
This address is of the main Surrogate home.
Thanks
Saurabh Kumar.
Clearly I must justify my actions in trying to get in touch with Rani and Mithu, never SCI .. unless you do a publicity shoot of your meeting or media.
Hi Saurhab
Clearly I must justify my actions in trying to get in touch with Rani and Mithu, never SCI .. unless you do a publicity shoot of your meeting or media.
Hi Saurhab
Thank you for your email, I am really delighted in this time of ugliness you have even bothered to answer.
Rani was not in surrogate accommodation, I have sent money to her in the past few years via SCI, now I doubt she ever got it. This is why I would like to deal with her directly.
Mithhu - the only address i have for her is on the contract and that is the SCi accommodation. I have no reply to a letter and photos I sent over 6 months ago. I know it is unlikely she ever stayed there.
Megan
16 comments:
In addition, I think Aussies' gov needs surro mom's consent for passport renewals, if you can't locate the surro mom, does this mean you can't renew the passports for your little ones?
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karen
Posts: 7
Join date: 2009-05-07
Location: Ireland
PostSubject: Re: *WARNING ON SHIVANI SACHDEV-GOUR AT SCI HEALTHCARE* Fri Nov 26, 2010 8:25 am
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I would give my left arm to have gone through any experience with Shivani because at the end of the day - SHIVANI gave you and others your baby!!!!!!! THAT IS THE ISSUE!!!!!
And equally there have been many who did get pregnant and as with every surrogacy clinic there is good and bad. However, it is up to each of us to look at the facts and go with our own beliefs. Many of us have looked at other clinics who are successful but there have been couples who did not have success and became very anti those clinics. That seems to be the way it goes with surrogacy. If all goes well they are the best clinic in the world, however if something goes awry then there are problems with that clinic, etc....
When I first began speaking with you you had issues with cleanliness, etc at Dr Patel's. Others had issues with SI that is why others were looking for alternatives to those clinics. Basically, what I am saying is that all people need to read EVERYONE's story and then decide on their own who is the best clinic for them to work with.
You look at Amani as Shivani's henchwoman- I however have found her very helpful and supportive. You bash Amani as having an incentive. However, You also receive a consulting fee for sending patients to certain clinics as does Crystal---that is your decision and also your incentive.
I have spoke to quite a few people whom are home with their babies safe and sound and cannot thank Shivani enough for what she has done for them. Dolly Rocker the main thing is do not take my opinion or her opinion as gospel ---look at all the clinics out there and all the blogs out there and decide from there. Contact people and see what their experiences are and then make a decision.
hope your little one is doing well - you are one of the lucky ones whose dream came to fruition. The rest of us are still waiting.
Best wishes to you Dolly Rocker and others looking into this process.
karen
It's Meegan from Tassie, and we have 2 perfect SCI babies to which you helped plan and assisted along the way. Meg, all the issues you have discovered, we knew about anyway. Or at the very least, assumed. To be honest, it was not feasible to think that Dr Shivani could afford to house our surrogate mothers in a 'hostel' with a hundred other surrogate mothers. Nor was it to take as fact that just about everyone's surrogate mother had been diagnosed with 'gestational diabetes' which required insulin that was 10 times more expensive than it is here in Australia!
Nor was it to have to pay for 'post c-section complications' when the day that apparently happened we were with our surrogate mother at the SCI office.
I am pleased that you have discovered these things and have confirmed what probably a lot of people already thought.
The thing is, would we have still gone ahead had we known these things prior to starting our journey with SCI? Yes. We were desperate to have a family and this appeared to be our only option. SCI know we are all vulnerable and desperate and perhaps they use this to their advantage. While this seems terrible by western standards, we also need to remember that we are engaging a clinic in a 3rd world country, that operates very differently to our own countries.
I would love to be able to stay in contact with our surrogate mothers, but we were told at the beginning that this is not possible. Whether this is fair or not, it is not up to us. It does not mean that we do not think of them all the time.
The thing I tell IP's if they ever ask - is to try and enjoy the journey for what it is. Don't get caught up in the politics of it all and don't make it about the money. Children are priceless. Have fun in the beautiful country that India is, try and focus on the positive and make it a memorable experience. And then if you are lucky enough to have a baby at the end of it like we were - twice - you will have a wonderful story to tell them. I will hold India in my heart forever - and no amount of 'unforeseen expenses' can take that away from me.
Love Meegan